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In this final installment of the series, you will get 5 quick and easy ways to Trust Yourself.
Fortunately, (2) two of the processes you were born with.
BONUS: I am gifting you with a FREE 21 Day Tracking Worksheet!
What’s In It For You…CONFIDENCE!
- It’s an inside job, this confidence thing.
- Self Trust builds an inner confidence that is unmatched by anything else.
The 5 Quick and Easy Processes. Use (1) one or use all…Your Choice!
2 Lies and 1 Fear that BLOCK you from GROWING CONFIDENCE.
2 Natural Born Skills you already possess that once developed will set you on the path to feeling safer with yourself so you can be yourself.
Beauty of Self Trust is feeling safe with yourself which others find soooo attractive.
LIE #1: Embarrassment threatens your social acceptance.
People overestimate the extent to which their appearance or actions are noticed by others.
One reason is the SPOTLIGHT EFFECT.
According to the Spotlight Effect, we greatly overestimate how many people take notice of us. We think they are looking and thinking about us.
However, in reality, it’s been shown that people are focused on themselves.
They are fixated on the things happening in their own lives and aren’t paying attention to you nearly as much as you think they are.
So they aren’t focused on. So they aren’t focused on. And if they are looking at you or thinking about you, you’re on their mind for a very short time.
LIE #2: Embarrassment will ruin you.
How many times have you witnessed someone elses embarrassing moment and thought to yourself, ” they were going to be the ruined?”
Didn’t it surprise you when they weren’t?
Who can you think of?
I know someone…
She was dumped by boyfriend on National TV. How much more humiliating is that?
Then she was also disrespectfully told by Ms. Kelly, that she didn’t have value on National TV also.
I’m talking about when she first appeared on the Real Housewives of New York.
This is Pre-Skinny Girl time.
This brave woman, Bethany Frankel, was struggling to have enough money to pay her rent and pursuing business ideas that didn’t always pan out likes she hoped.
She was the poorest of the Housewives and the least regarded: see for yourself in this clip when Kelly Bensimone’s so called put her in her place with her: I’m up here and you are down here.
I love Bethany’s cool – go f*ck yourself demeanor. (sorry guys, but when you’ve been a People Pleaser most of your life, you admire someone who can take on a manipulating mean girl). You feel me?
This girl is scrappy.
Now she is a Business Mogul who’s made Billions, the Creator of the Skinny Girl Cocktails, with an expanding Food Products Distribution line, shape wear line, Appliances to come next I believe, and author of several New York Times Best Sellers all showcasing her Being TRUE TO HERSELF!
She recently was the Host of her very own talk show Bethany. Which Failed…was she embarrassed. NO.
She’s back on Real Housewives of New York City being very humble, venerable and scrappy. Not letting anyone put her down or tell her who she is.
NOT to mention: the Divorce and the losses she’s suffered with it- Let’s be honest, most of us would have run and hid and not shown our face for years. no
- That’s proof that you don’t have be afraid of being embarrassed.
- You can stay true to yourself regardless of what you are facing.
**You just Need be you. You are enough. let things be what they are.**
So this just a Fear being Judged. Which is just a fear of letting people see and know who you really are. It’s a lie. Embarrassment doesn’t ruin you.
SHARPEN THESE 2 SKILLS – These you already have
#1 LET’S PLAY (*Free 21 Day Tracking Guide)
Remember how you lost yourself in play when you were a child?
“My thing was being outside, predominantly, anything with movement. Swinging on the swings, swimming in a pool, racing others on my bike and then there were my Barbies and playing house I liked that too. I could play jacks or marbles all day if I could. I very rarely wanted to stay inside and color or draw or watch t.v., I really just wanted to be outside.” Lana McMurray
What about you? What was your thing?
When you played, I’m talking about the times you were fully engaged in play, how did you feel? Sure of yourself right?
Your inner child is a BIG part of the adult you are now.
When you make him/her feel safe, you will feel Sure of Yourself again.
That’s the beauty of Play and according to research, Playing is vitally important to us adults.
In fact, some say that 10 minutes of engrossed play is all it takes to get the benefits.
Some benefits of play are:
~Reconnection to your “Natural Instincts” = Increases Ability to See Yourself More Accurately and be True to Self.
~Releases pent-up stress hormones = Increases Energy & Ability to Get and Stay Motivated
~Increases Bonding Hormones = Increases Self-Trust & Self Acceptance
So I’ve created a Free 21 Day Play Tracking Guide: Download for you to use Immediately that:
1 Gives you permission to Play.
2 Trains you to build the new habit.
3 Unlocks the hidden gems you’ve forgotten or have kept from yourself.
Bring back play to reach your extraordinary life. Get the Free Guide Here.
#2 YOUR VALUES
Values – They are unique to you.
It’s what you enjoy, what inspires you, what you would like more of.
Knowing your values will help you understand yourself better.
A satisfying and meaningful life is built by knowing your values and living your values.
Only you know what you value.
People will try to give you the values to hold, but it they aren’t yours, they are imposter values.
Imposter values don’t carry the power to make you confidently strong inward and outward like your own values do.
And that’s what values do essentially. Make you strong inside –
- giving you the power inside to have an opinion.
- giving you the power outside to speak your truth.
Here’s an easy way to know your values.
As you go about your day, record on either on your phone’s notepad or on a simple piece of paper in your pocket, things that fall into 4 categories:
1. You enjoy.
2. Makes you feel inspired.
3. Would like more of.
4. Absolutely dislike or even hate.
- Now — Just track these 4 Categories and you’ll start seeing a pattern
- Next test it to see if this is a value by doing more or what you like and eliminating or avoiding what you dislike.
- Finally break the rules. See what it feels like to not listen to what you have discovered is valuable to you. How does it feel when you don’t allow yourself to do what you enjoy, what inspires you, what you want more of? What happens when you ignore yourself and do what you dislike or hate. Violation is what should be felt. You want to stay away from this feeling.
- The opposite of violation is a value to you. Take courage and honor that.
Ok, so now you have been given some very useful tools to build your internal worth – Self Trust.
If you are struggling to put these into action feel free to contact me HERE to discuss.
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Here’s What You Can Do Now.
Step 1: Whitelist and prioritize all emails from me – lana mcmurray.
Not sure how to whitelist? We put together a handy little tutorial for you.
I’m sharing some of my own personal success secrets with you so that you too can follow your own path and get Free 2 Thrive.
Step 2: Come hangout with us on Facebook! Click here & join our private Facebook group!
This community is a place where you get helpful advice on how to navigate change and get supported as you grow.
Once you are accepted into the group, check out the rules and pinned post and Introduce yourself.
Step 3: Hey and be sure to subscribe to my channel. I have several new videos coming out. My channel is a Lifestyle Channel. I’m a wine enthusiast, a foodie, I love fingernail polish and makeup so there will be quite a bit for you to enjoy coming your way soon. Go ahead and subscribe now so you will be notified.
Take a look in your inbox now and grab your free worksheet and stop by the group and say hi. I’ve been waiting for you